Dr. Ekta Taneja, M.D.

My values were to avoid antidepressants, and I said I wanted to avoid SSRIs due to being hesitant of any med that causes sexual side effects. I came in to get an rx for a new antidepressant though, but I wasn't 100% sure I should take it. I believe I wasn't a good candidate for an SSRI rx because 1) I work at night so can't take pills at the same time each day 2) I hate appointments and don't have executive function skills to take the same dose on the clock every day 3) Don't have the patience to taper off very slowly 4) Have autism, narcissistic personality traits, and a history of socially inappropriate behaviors when under stress or in unfamiliar social situations. I was fine, had three jobs, free housing provided by my employer, but had moderate depression and was just bored and had a life skills deficit, a bad diet, lack of exercise, bad sleep, etc. This provider took these lifestyle as having a psychiatrical etiology, failed to value and respect and appreciate my personal values of avoiding antidepressants and especially ones that have sexual side effects, asked no probing questions, did not do a focused assessment, did not get any relevant history, did not assess anything psychosocial. She just listened to my story and essentially delegated prescribing to me - the patient. Basically she wanted me to be my own doctor and her being a printer for prescriptions that I want to take. All she said was, 'Well the other two antidepressants you tried don't have sexual side effects, and the only one left over to try are the SSRIs. If you want them, I will prescribe it to you, up to you.' I asked what she recommends based on her assessment and experience, she opened the textbook and saidm, 'Well the textbook says that the first line of treatment is Lex and the starting dose is 10.' I switched into people pleasing mode and thought I should take the prescription because otherwise why did I come wasting their time again and that maybe I should try it since everyone around me takes them and encourages me to take them. This provider gave no medication education, no warning about tapering off, and did not assess for hypomania (which I got when she did my first dose increase to the maximum of 20). Then I quit the med and did an inappropriate taper, taking like half a pill or a pill every other day over two weeks. While I was on it, I had hypomania - talking fast, getting into other people's business at work and with family and friends, and being unusually rude to people. When I stopped it, I became easily frustrated, angry, ragefull, small things would make me angry and I became very mean to people with no empathy. I also got obsessive thoughts about work. This fight or flight 'hurt brain' state had lasted continuously for the last three years since stopping the med which I took for about 6 months. I had never taken psych meds before in my life except for trying two other antidepressants briefly for a few weeks and stopping with no issues. The SSRI did me in. All these symptoms were new after I started and stopped the med. I had a 15 year career with good employee reviews, good reputation at work. good work references. When I was on the med, I did inappropriate manic things at work, when I stopped it abruptly, I ended up fired, evicted, sued, and traumatized and destroyed my whole social network. I would say I was never a great candidate for this med, and had this provider had prudence, care, cultural and value respect, she would have recommended a wait and see approach instead of an SSRI medication, which can cause inappropriate behavior in people who have narcissistic personality traits or autism and already have trouble staying with the social norms around them. My impression is that the provider was imprudent, under-educated, uncaring, quickly judgement, non-chalant, lacked empathy and intuition. This was just my impression and of course I could be wrong. It was just my my biased experience, so take it with a grain of salt. But beware, two appointments destroyed my career, reputation, support network and permanently hurt my nervous system where now I am a lot less tolerant to stress and am a different numbed out person, where before I had moderate depression but wasn't any of that. I also became a lot more sensitive to coffee which now makes me easily emotional and rageful too. These may have been brief pre-existing issues, but they grew from a fly that I could manage into an unmanageable elephant. If it wasn't for curiousity that it could improve my life, I would have never taken it.